Coldest Winter for a Year?
Dr Vernon Coleman MB ChB DSc FRSA
According to meteorological experts, climate change theorists, global warming advocates and global cooling connoisseurs, it almost certainly looks as though this may probably be the coldest winter for a year – although it may be necessary to fiddle the figures a bit in order to prove this.
The experts, advocates and connoisseurs also warn that next winter is also likely to be chilly and that old people on roller blades will be at risk when pavements become slippery.
There is general agreement among the experts, advocates and connoisseurs that there is an urgent need for more climate change conferences to be held in posh hotels on the other side of the world and for the experts, advocates and connoisseurs to be given bigger expense accounts and more publicity on television and the wireless.
The experts, advocates and connoisseurs have also agreed that anyone telling the truth about the climate change myth should be ostracised and banned from all media.
`These people who doubt the validity of our argument that the world is getting either hotter or colder are threatening our livelihood, our expenses, our perks and our book and television deals,’ said an angry spokesperson. `This is the biggest scare scam since the AIDS nonsense and we thoroughly intend to make the most of it. We have joined with the vaccination people and the drug companies to make sure that Vernon Coleman is not interviewed on the BBC or, indeed, anywhere else.’
Copyright Vernon Coleman 2018