Whatís that Noise?

Vernon Coleman





I had my first mobile phone in the 1980s. It was as big and as heavy as two bricks. I carried it around in a briefcase. There was no room in the case for anything else. Whenever I used the phone people would stop and stare.

You would think I would be able to use one of the damned things by now.

But Iím not.

Today, Antoinette pointed out that my being able to answer a mobile phone call depends on the following:

1. My remembering to take the phone with me.
2. My remembering to switch on the phone.
3. My hearing the phone when it rings.
4. My recognising the ring it makes as itís coming from the phone in my pocket (rather than someone elseís phone).
5. My being able to find the phone before it stops ringing.
6. My being able to remember which button to press to answer a call.

You may think Iím kidding.

I wish I were.

Copyright Vernon Coleman April 2019





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