The Bastards Canít Arrest Me Twice

Vernon Coleman

The bewildering lunacy continues.

So, now the Government says that the over 70s will have to remain under house arrest until at least the autumn of 2022. And even then the over 70s will only be allowed out of their homes if a vaccine is available. The clear implication is that individuals will be forced to remain under house arrest (and, again, letís stop mincing words Ė locking people in is house arrest) unless they agree to have the damned vaccination. Those who watched my first YouTube video (which was put up on YouTube) on March 18th will know that I predicted from the beginning that this whole farce was about demonising the elderly and forcing through a tough vaccination programme.

I feel a huge, billowing sense of blackening despair.

For many over 70s, who let us be blunt the years ahead are not endless, this is a life sentence. They will never be allowed out of their homes again. They will never see friends or relatives except at a distance or via a camera and a screen. They wonít be able to visit a solicitor to make a will. They will never be allowed to move house. They will never be able to buy Christmas or birthday cards. They will never be allowed to buy presents for those they love unless they buy them online. They will never be allowed to go to a cafť or a restaurant. They will never be allowed to play sport (and many over 70s enjoy golf, tennis, bowls and other games). They will never again be able to visit a garden centre, a stately home or a wildlife park. Those who run businesses will have to close them and make their staff redundant. They will never again be allowed to go on holiday. (Those businesses which rely on attracting the over 70s will quickly go bust.) They wonít be able to visit friends or relatives in hospital. They wonít be able to go the pub or the funfair. No more parties.

In short, the over 70s will never again do any of the many things which add spice and flavour to life.

Their homes will forever remain unpainted, steadily falling into disrepair because they are neither allowed to purchase what they need or to hire workmen to visit their homes.

What about those over 70-year-olds who have second homes, in this country or abroad? What about the dozens of MPs who are over 70? (The one good thing to come out of this will be that the House of Lords will have to close its doors.) What about all those company directors and chairmen who will have to resign?

This is all, typically ill-thought out lunacy because many over 70s are fitter and healthier than folk who are decades younger.

But thatís the whole point isnít it?

This is nothing to do with protecting the over 70s.

This is, as I said at the beginning of this unscientific charade, all about oppressing, isolating and excluding the elderly from society.

If the long term house arrest were being introduced to protect the over 70s surely they would get some choice in the matter?

The over 70s have already been told that their age makes them ineligible for the health care they have paid for, so why wouldnít they be allowed to take their chances out in the world?

But itís not about protecting the over 70s. Itís all about excluding them from society.

Of course, there are one or two options.

Unless and until they are forced to carry their birth certificates with them, the oldies will be able to sneak out of their homes (if they can get past the neighbours) as long as they donít look over 70.

Maybe plastic surgery would be an option.

Or, come to think about it, the over 70s could merely change their age.

Today, everyone has the right to decide whether they are male or female.

So, we must all have the right to decide how old we are.

Well, Iíve decided that Iím now 63. And thatís the age Iím going to remain.

Ha! Iím no longer in the over 70s age group.

I feel much livelier already.

And what the hell can the bastards do if they catch me sitting in a cafť with my dear wife?

Arrest me?

Theyíve done that already.

Copyright Vernon Coleman April 19th 2020

Vernon Colemanís guide book for feisty older folk is called Kick Ass A-Z for Over 60s. It is available as a paperback and an eBook.