The Good Life Aint So Good

Vernon Coleman

A growing number of ignorant, naïve and rather stupid Greens now believe that the time has come to live their lives ‘off the grid’.

They believe that they can enjoy independent lives without relying on electrical power provided by the grid.

(That’s what ‘off the grid’ means.)

They claim to be able to manage with a windmill and a few solar panels.

Well, they might be able to have a sort of life on sunny days and on days when there is a strong wind.

But if they want to heat their homes they will have to turn off the lights.

They won’t be able to cook a meal and watch television at the same time.

Oh, and they’ll have to cheat.

They’ll need fuel for the truck they need to collect supplies. (They’ll soon get fed up with using cabbage leaves as toilet paper).

They’ll need fuel for the chain saw. (Cutting up wood without one will prove impossible if you want more than an hour’s worth of fire each day.)

And they’ll spend every minute of their working day looking after their composting toilet and their vegetable patch and grinding flour to make bread.

Life ‘off the grid’ might sound attractive.

But for those of us accustomed to civilisation it offers a pretty miserable way of life.

Still, I don’t mind the Greens buggering off into the hills to live ‘off the grid’.

It’ll mean more electricity for the rest of us.

Copyright Vernon Coleman March 2019