How To Tell If You’re An Alien

Vernon Coleman

I think I must be an alien. Find out if you are too by taking this simple quiz. Just answer one point for every YES answer you give.

1. Do you feel that moral standards are constantly sinking to new low? (And no one else seems to care.)
2. Do you regard new fashions, art and modern music as incomprehensible rubbish?
3. Are you are puzzled by the fact that so many of your fellow citizens seem eager to welcome into the country immigrants who hate us?
4. Do you find it difficult to understand why people want to support the undemocratic European Union – especially since the evidence shows that it was originally devised by Adolf Hitler and the Nazis?
5. Do you feel that dignity and respect have disappeared from our society?
6. Do you feel that the media have lost touch with real people?
7. Do you despair of finding anything worth watching on television – and usually end up watching DVDs?
8. Are you appalled by the lies politicians tell?
9. Do you have difficulty understanding why bankers are still being given huge bonuses – even though their banks had to be bailed out by taxpayers and are still not making a profit?
10. Do you think young people are too obsessed with themselves and their ‘rights’?
11. Have you lost interest in professional sport because the passion has disappeared and the participants now seem interested only in the money?
12. Do you think there is far too much twittering by people who really ought to do something more useful with their lives – and shut up whingeing?

Score one point for each YES answer. If you scored 8 or more then you too are an Alien. Congratulations.

Copyright Vernon Coleman

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